by Jonny | Sep 30, 2011 | Updates
I don't know how my mother has done it, but she wrote letters to the president and the mayor of Taichung. Ordinarily I would have joined the military as soon as I became Taiwanese or as soon as the Taichung city council sent the letter out for my draft.
However according to my mother and 2 police officers/council workers, they stated that I wouldn't have to join by October next year. – They have allowed me to continue my studies and by next year October I would have hoped my Chinese would have at least improved substantially enough for me to even not worry too much about communication in the Taiwanese military.
This is great news considering I was worrying very much about joining and not being able to communicate effectively enough to be considered part of an infantry group. I really want the experience of being in the Taiwanese military, so I look forward to 2012 where I will gain that experience with enough Chinese capabilities to get some understanding on the way the Taiwanese military works. I will also post on my other website my experiences:
http://armour.ws
(My military genre website)
It is funny considering the 2 officers who came to see my mother today, they mentioned loopholes or ways to get me out from even serving. – Which I find incredibly weird. They stated because of my ADD I could use it as an excuse to not join. But I want to. However we'll see if I want to by next year! 😛
by Jonny | Sep 28, 2011 | Updates
I played football today, I enjoyed that, but it only feels good for so long and in the end… it ends. Everyone goes home and goes to sleep.
I have been awake for almost 3 days now and going onto my 4th day. I should be really tired, but now that I'm home, I don't feel tired. I think I could probably play another 3 hours of football and still be in the same state.
I just want to feel relaxed, secure and I want everything just to be right. That may not make sense, but I just want it to be all OK.
Sometimes I just want life to just shut down from existence. I just want to get away.
I had a really good day today. Well sort of. I studied in the library for 7 hours and then went to play football for the first time in 4 years.
I should feel happy. Yet here I am feeling lost with no direction, quite literally. (Just thinking about it)
I just want to be at peace. But I can't be at peace. I just can't explain myself either that well as I don't know what the problem is. I just wish I could be a different person and not have to struggle so much god damnit.
Test
I mean I have a test tomorrow for lesson 6. I just finished learning the lesson 5 characters. I thought I was ahead in that. But memorizing so many of these characters is frustrating. I just want to scream right now. (In fact I'm doing that in my head right now)
I'm fake
I have also come to realize I'm very fake. Even when I'm not happy, I appear very happy and I'm good at making myself look happy. I just don't want to upset anyone. I just want to be real. But being real means being upset in front of everyone. It means hurting others. I wish I never told my close friend here in Taiwan about my troubles. I don't want to hurt of affect anyone, but I just feel a little hurt inside.
by Jonny | Sep 28, 2011 | Updates
Yesterday I went with possibly who I would call one of greatest friends I have made in Taiwan to go grab something to eat. We both spoke to the boss (Laoban) or my friend really did the talking since he knows more Chinese than me. – But he's studied very hard to get to where he is now with Chinese.
I knew the boss/owner of the restaurant since my friend Laura knew him and when it was her birthday, he seemed extremely nice and kind. – He bought Laura a cake, just on the whim, since we were just passing by. So I said to my friend, let's go eat at his place. His food was pretty nice and would recommend eating at his again.
He drew me and my Korean friend some pictures, which I thought were pretty damn funny:
The Laoban's representation of me with the teacher is of epic proportions. It is amazing how a picture can so easily explain your situation or the way you feel. Good shit, as I would usually say in the UK and good fucking shit for the amazing representation of a situation of the entire nation! (WOT)
by Jonny | Sep 27, 2011 | Updates
I’ve been reading this story about the two American hikers who were recently released or at least after being in Iranian detention for 2 years. According to this BBC article I read they were only released on a $1 million dollar bail and were both flown to Oman by a Royal Air Force of Oman passenger jet.
So I have read they went hiking in Iraq. That brings me to the question as to why they were in a highly volatile place where there is a war going on. They went to a war zone to go hiking from what I understood. I can’t understand that.
Their parents must have told them that it was too dangerous and even their friends must have told or warned them that going to Iraq to simply go hiking is a very bad idea. I mean America has enough places to go hiking, why in any sense of reason would they travel to a war-zone?
Not only did they travel to a war-zone to supposedly go hiking, they traveled next a border of another country! Not just any country, they traveled on the Iraq-Iran border. Of course the United States has imposed sanctions against Iran, so relations between those two countries government and possibly people aren’t at their highest.
There can only be a question of their mental intellect since they did 2 of the worst things I can think of when going hiking:
- They went to a war-zone.
- They traveled along-side the border of another country, of which whom is not too friendly with their own country.
So, were they spies?
It’s highly possible they were spies, although I’m pretty sure if the U.S. wanted to get spies into Iran they would have done it more covertly. Unless the U.S. is slacking in terms of their intelligence service, then I can’t think of why they would be spies or how they could possibly be spies, since it seems they were caught so easily. Perhaps bad circumstances or U.S. intelligence services didn’t realize how well-defended the Iranian border was/is.
But I don’t buy that. I think these two hikers were just not thinking of the consequences of travelling to a war-zone, let alone traveling alongside the border of what I would consider a hostile country towards the United States in terms of relations. (There is no US embassy in Iran, i.e. no diplomatic relations and the US has imposed several sanctions and has accused Iran of developing nuclear weapons)
In retrospect, just two idiots hiking, not thinking of the consequences. I mean who goes hiking in Iraq let alone alongside the border of Iran? Who the hell does this? I can’t think of anything more stupid that you could do as a US citizen. I also specifically mention “US citizen” considering the fact that the US spearheaded the attacks in Iraq and spearheads any sanctions which occur against Iran. So you can see why Iranian authorities wouldn’t be so kind and the relations between Iraq and the US are a bit shaky considering the war cost Iraq the lives of 100,000 civilians. The civilian population in my opinion could sway in terms of kindness both ways depending on the person. I.e. one Iraqi could have lost a relative because of a US bomb or anything like that, because they are in a WARZONE which involves their own country.
Now that I got that off my head. What a waste of $1 million dollars to bail these guys out.
Although they don’t deserve to be locked up in a jail for the 8 years they were sentenced, yet alone the 2 years they did serve, I will give them the benefit of the doubt that every human being has done something ultimately stupid in their life. I guess they will talk about this in the future, if god forbid, they have children.
by Jonny | Sep 26, 2011 | Updates
I've find my motivation. In fact I don't need any motivation to learn Chinese. – That is my motivation. I feel that if you need to be motivated into doing something, you are going to do it "half-assed". Doing it properly, means you have to like the subject you are doing and you will have to be serious about learning but also find it fun to keep you motivated. (Although I said previously you don't need to be motivated to learn the language for a reason, but you do need to be motivated to study the language, but also enjoy the language) – Now I feel I am talking out of my but-hole, but that doesn't matter, because I'm just spewing whatever is coming out of head.
Although I'm finding Chinese difficult I'm trying hard enough. But is that enough? I hope so. But also gaining proper understanding of Chinese is paramount. You may work your butt off and you may work the hardest you have ever worked, but that still might not make you understand. – I guess that is the stage of where I'm at. But I talked to my good American friend who has studied for a year and he said that the Chinese in the end will just "click" into your head. I guess it's like how I can type so fast and accurately. I couldn't do it before, but after a lot of practice and usage I'm now able to fluently type and as they say practice makes perfect.
Although I haven't been to sleep for the past 24 hours continuing onto now, I feel my drive to learn Chinese at night now for some reason. The only problem is that I don't get any sleep, but I find I'm more concentrated at night, so it's all good.
by Jonny | Sep 26, 2011 | Updates
I don’t know why, but I am re-motivated to learn Chinese now. Maybe it is because of this quote and combined with my medicine that I am taking, it let me think thoroughly about what this actually means.
I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear. – Nelson Mandela
But today I never conquered my fear. It will take time for me to become more confident with Chinese and a lot of studying will have to be involved. My brain sort of freezes when I’m up in front of everyone trying to read a dialogue which is in Chinese. I mean it isn’t as if I don’t know how to read it or how to memorize it, it is the fact that when I’m under pressure my mind scrambles in every direction. It often happens with new friends, but I am becoming better at controlling it.
But I’m definitely studying harder. Although I should really have studied hard on Friday, Saturday and Sunday. I only studied from Sunday evening to Monday 7:30am. I never got any sleep, so I was a little knackered in class and fell asleep a few times.
I’m taking this learning curve very slowly if that makes sense. I don’t want to rush and miss things. But the paper that the teacher gave us for homework was absolutely hard. It took me 2 hours to complete it and apparently the test we are having tomorrow (She changed it from today to tomorrow) is going to be as hard. So luckily I have an extra day to further study for this test. It will give me more time for preparation and to hopefully be able to answer most of these hard questions without any trouble. Although realistically, I don’t think I will be able to answer most these questions.
I just wish the test was a little easier. For example translating bopomo into Chinese characters. It is very hard for all of us in the class, from what I have seen, to be looking for errors/mistakes and correcting them in sentences. You have to learn how to do it somehow, but you really need to know the grammar in Chinese first before you can do any of that. I kind of know the grammar structure, but it is very difficult to re-arrange words into sentences which make sense, since the structure is almost backwards to that of English in some sentences. Plus there are measure words, which I haven’t really understood or studied much about. But they are horrible. I mean you have to remember the measure words for different objects/things/people. Why can’t you just say “three people” or “2 newspapers”, instead you have to say liang fen bao. (Fen = being the measure word)
Whatever the case, I hope to study hard today, after a good rest, since I need one.
